Wednesday, December 31, 2014

What is this, dress up?

What on earth are Abe and Elle making me wear? This is embarrassing. Green is so not my color. I mean, honestly. Do these people read Vogue? For goodness sake. What dog wears a jacket?
I understand it's cold outside. I see Abe and Elle putting on so many layers before I get to go out in the morning, it's like, "Hello? Can't you see I've got to pee here?"

I roll outta bed, and I'm like, "Well, I'm dressed. Let's get going." Instead, I've got to stand around and watch them put on three layers of socks, weird things on their hands Inka calls "loves." And then they put on "hats" which is weird because the one place on their bodies I know they have fur, they cover it. Weird they are.

So Elle has also mentioned "boots," and I hope to heck she's talking about for Abe, because there ain't know way in bajeepers she's putting me in them. I mean... Seriously. How would I get these on?
Does this look normal to you? I didn't think so.
I've got a reputation to uphold. Just the other day some random dude was like, "Wow. What kind of dog is that?" and Abe was like, "Awesome." I can't be seen in boots. It's just...

Wait a minute. Inka tells me that Timberlands are, like, really cool right now.

OK... well, we'll see if the neighbors can handle me.
Hipster in hat, bow tie, and mustache.

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