Thursday, February 23, 2012

Abe's gone missing?

Something just ain't right. Wasn’t there some dude that used to live here? I mean, I kinda remember this tall, lanky fella. *Shrug*

Anyway, all I know is that things are pretty awesome. Yesterday Elle took me to a fun run. No, literally, a Fun Run. That’s what they call them. Seems a bit redundant, don't you think?

Then today. Whoa! Two, yes two, trips to the faux dog park. That's where we go when we don't want to go all the way out to the real one. And, there were real dogs there, not just faux ones. Both trips if you count Pearl. So, does that make the faux dog park the real one? I think I just confused myself.

Later in the day, that nice lady from Fetch came again just after I woke up from my midday nap. Totally like her.  She takes me on walks and stuff.  Like I said, things are awesome.

But, something seems missing.  I can't put my dew claws on it.

Oh, and I'm busy! I didn’t even get to finish my post yesterday since Elle was paying so much attention to me. What is she trying to prove? Crap. She’s awake now, and she has her funny reflective clothes on.  I think that means we’re going on another run. Woot!

Still and all, I think I miss somebody. Ah yes, that tall dude. What's his name again? Abs or something? Anyway, I hope he comes back soon so I can get some rest. Seriously, Elle and the Fetch people are killing me here. Oh, not literally. At least I sleep better and stuff.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

183 people.

Where you are all from.
Pearl's been doing some analysis of blog readership yesterday. Her dew claws were flying every which way, and she says 183 people read my open letter to the Champaign County Humane Society. I feel kinda weird about that. I mean, I know it was an "open letter," but it's kinda like hanging out your dirty laundry for others to see.

I'm not sure what that means exactly, Abe uses that expression all the time when talking about Pearl and me behind our tails, but it's not like we're supposed to know what it means. Like when he speaks to Elle in Spanish. Come on, dude. Do you think you're that clever? Hola, chico. ¿Tienes problemas? Idiota. Falls Sie sich gefragt haben, funktioniert es auch in deutscher Sprache. Shrug. You can't fool us.

Anyway, I've been part of the family and everything for almost a year, and now that CCHS listed the post on their Facebook page, it's like everybody knows I've dumped them.  What's the point of a Dear John letter if there's no anonymity? Isn't there any privacy on the web these days?

What? Pearl has reminded me that I signed the letter. Whatever. Well, the cat's out of the bag. Hey, there's another one, an idiomatic expression. Has anyone honestly seen a cat in a bag before? Maybe a cat in a hat, but never a bag. Mostly, I see them out in the neighborhood when on a walk or something. You mean they actually live in bags? Now I feel bad. I just assumed they lived in houses and had couches to claw to death and stuff.

Well, now you know I've dumped CCHS, but it really is for the better. They've got more room in their hearts to care for others like Katie.


She seems like a good friend. Abe and Elle are talking about visiting her just to see. You never know with those two. Pearl and I may end up with a new friend.

Anyway, have a good week!
Trying to distract Abe at his desk. Hehe!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

An open letter to the Champaign County Humane Society.

Dear Champaign County Humane Society,

It’s hard to believe that nearly a year has gone by since I last saw you. I was named Evan then, and I was feeling your love even though I might not have shown it. You gave me shelter when others wouldn’t, and you gave me grub when I would eat. I know I might not have devoured my food, but can you blame me? I was sad and lonely. Even though you were there for me, I just couldn’t get over the fact that I didn’t have a forever home. You gave me love, and I appreciate that. I do. Yet, our love was only temporary.

I’m writing today to tell you that I’ve found another. I know it’s no surprise. You haven’t seen me in so long, and you were probably wondering what happened to me. It didn’t take long to replace you. I probably shouldn’t tell you that. You were my first, after all. What we had was special. It meant something. It did. However, this new love has things you couldn’t offer like a backyard, trips to the dog park, long afternoons in winter sunshine in a nice warm bed. I get treats and walks and, hey, did I mention footballs and stairs that go to a place called the “basement?” Oh, how things have changed.

Still... there will always be what we had. Right? I will always remember you.

Jackaroo (a.k.a. Evan)

Saturday, February 11, 2012

It's my birthday?

Apparently it's my birthday. Now, you might remember Christmas a couple of months ago and all the gifts and stuff that I got then. Well, that was for some dead dude's birthday. So, I figure that I'd be, like, showered with presents for my own. Pearl says I've circled the sun twice. That ought to be worth something, right?
It's my birthday, and this is my birthday cake?
I've been robbed. There's no other explanation for it because what have I gotten for my birthday?

I got shot. No, seriously. I. Got. Shot!

Oh, wait a minute. Pearl says I forgot the "s." Spelling. Whatever. It turns out that Abe took me to the vet for my birthday, and I got "shot(s)" for rabies, parvo, and distemper (Ha, like I even need that one!). I had blood drawn! What kind of vampires are these people? It's my birthday for goodness sake! That's like visiting the dentist on your wedding day or maybe going to the amusement park before heading to your own funeral. It's cruel. I thought we had trained Abe and Elle better than this!

So, the blood was to check on heartworm. Yeah, Happy Valentine's Day to you too. Nothing says love then a big ole worm tugging at your heartstrings. I'll keep you posted on the results, but since I get a tasty treat every month to prevent the little buggers, I'm sure I'll be fine.

Of course, that's little consolation on my birthday, after all. I mean, that'd be one crappy birthday present, being told I have worms in my heart. Thanks. Couldn't you have ruined some other day if I did have them? Geesh. Someone tell Abe and Elle they really have to work on their timing.

Well, I've noticed we've been "given liberties" lately that had been reserved only for special occasions, like chillaxing in the living room and soaking up the sun's rays. Can you blame Abe and Elle for bending the rules some? Pearl says we've got them wrapped around our little dew claws. Hehe!
This is the life.